Words: Sirish Chandran
Photography: Gaurav S Thombre
What can I say about the new S-Class that hasn’t already been said? Oh yes, I know. Cheap! Never thought I’d say that but out here, sandwiched between the Rolls-Royce and the Range Rover, the Mercedes is the cheapest car. And lest you think otherwise the Merc is anything but cheap – costing over a crore of rupees and … crucially … feeling every bit the crore plus rupees. In fact, when you take pricing into account, the S-Class comes across as insane, almost Maruti-like, value for money. There – that’s another thing I never expected to say about the Big Benz.
We’ve already waxed eloquent about the S-Class but some things are worth repeating. First and foremost is the quality of the engineering. The Rolls does feel bespoke and hand-built, but even against that very high benchmark the S-Class feels insanely good. The fittings in the cabin, the switchgear, the damping of every control, the resolution of the big TFT screens, everything feels bloody expensive. And the S-Class leaves you in no illusion of her provenance – it has always been a rolling advertisement for Mercedes’ engineering prowess and it all translates into a divine driving experience. On the hill climb roads leading up to the Oxford golf club, the S-Class is the easiest to drive, and the handling means it is the fastest to get to the gates. For a big luxury saloon it always feels calm, poised and (relatively) eager and the silky-smooth V8 petrol engine is always up for some action. This is a turbo-charged engine, twin turbos at that, but there’s no such thing as turbo lag and the power build-up is luxuriously smooth and predictable. In fact, on the driving experience front, the only real criticism one can level is that the driver is forced to grip a steering wheel that is most unappetising to behold.
Never mind, most owners will be sitting in the back and … hard to believe … the Merc offers the most comfortable seats. The front passenger seats fold forward, a foot rest pops from behind it and the rear seat extends and reclines to form a lavish seat from which to kick off one’s shoes and stress over the movement of the stock market. Lower back hurting from the stress? The in-built massagers will take care of it. Need soft tunes to soothe your nerves? There’s Burmester sound that is ridiculously good. Head hurting from firing your managers? The pillow attached to the rear seat headrests are as soft as your mamma’s bosom. It even has seatbelt buckles that automatically extend and retract a few inches, airbags in the rear seatbelts and a seat-cushion-mounted airbag that prevents reclining passengers from submarining in a crash. You can even choose between four different fragrances that are piped in through the air-conditioning.
It also is fully equipped with all the LED trickery you can imagine, so much so that there aren’t any incandescent bulbs, anywhere in the S-Class. In total there are over 500 LEDs and on the inside you can adjust the colour and intensity of the mood lighting or just turn it all off and go to sleep while the driver takes you to where you want to go. In fact, there’s enough tech in the Benz , for it to drive you home, except our current laws won’t permit fully autonomous driving. (Actually in India, with half our roads not having clearly marked out white lines, I doubt it’d even work). Our current laws also force Mercedes to disable Magic Body Control for India that reads the road ahead and softens the dampers if it sees a pothole or speedbreaker. Yet it’s hard, really hard, to complain about the ride quality that can best be described as sumptuous.
In fact the whole car is one sumptuous feast. It is brimming with all the technology that’s good and great in the car world today. It pampers you. When you’re in the mood you can whip all those 450 horses into shape. It looks good too. And it does it all at a fifth of the price of the Rolls, and half the Rangie’s! There’s no question about it – the head will always buy the S-Class. And if a standard S-Class is not enough, Merc now offer the Designo package to personalise your car with unique exterior shades and interior trim. And if you still insist on shelling out more cash, Mercedes will happily offer you the new Mercedes-Maybach S600 that is an even longer, long-wheelbase S-Class with a V12 engine and an even more fabulously appointed cabin.
What can I say, sometimes even the best is never really enough.